Day one of my fruit and vegetable diet has gone well enough. I’ve eaten grapes, tomatoes, an apple, a carrot and I’m going to buy some watermelon later on.

When we were walking through the supermarket I wanted to hurry by all the stuff that I won’t be eating for the next little while because I didn’t want to think about it. I haven’t been thinking too much about the things I cannot eat but it has already come up a bit.

I’m quite conscious of smells but that may be because my friend Tim told me about having that experience himself. We’ll see where it goes from here and how I feel when Mandy’s eating her dinner, ha, ha.

I’m starting a type of fast this Sunday. It’ll either be only fruit or only fruit and veggies with nothing cooked. The idea is to 1) clean out my body and 2) see how it feels to eat no meat or dairy or salt/sugar based food 3) to restart my commitment to healthy eating which has been lost in all the confusion of life.

I’ll stick with this diet for at least seven but probably 14 days after which I’ll reintroduce chicken and some other basic things.

I’m at about 178 to 180 now and want to get back to 170. I think that if I keep with this type of diet I can easily do that and be healthy and active too.

Japanese food for Mandy’s birthday and much more rain and riding around in the rain than I would have liked.

Work schedule constantly up in the air.

Ankle slowly more functional and less painful.

Very ready for a long and well deserved rest and very, very aware that most of the world probably feels the exact same way.

Enjoying Boston-Los Angeles a great deal. Still certain that Boston is going to win the series. The bench showed out last night and the Lakers ain’t got an answer for that.

My own jump shot was falling in practice yesterday, which felt good.

Packing and giving things away, I have so many attachments to physical things. Part of me knows it’s silly and part of me feels like giving something away is like saying that I don’t appreciate the thing I’m giving away. It’s a deep emotional thing that I don’t fully understand. I try to appreciate all that I’ve been given.

I met with two adult students today, businesswomen who’re motivated, funny and at least a little curious. We talked about the class I could offer them and they were excited about the ideas I had, it was awesome…

Then I went to my kids school, I prepared my lessons I was there well ahead of time as I always am. I got everything ready and checked my email. Then I came back down and they’ve all arrived half an hour early, foisted on us by parents who don’t want to be parenting, the boss allows this even though it is a clear abuse of the schools kindness.

It is an annoyance but up until recently it hadn’t been a problem for me. But today as on many recent days my boss asks me about the kids homework which they can’t do, I do my best to simply ignore this. I’ve clearly explained that the homework is reviewed and corrected every day in class, that I don’t expect them all to be able to do it every time, that it takes time with kids especially first graders.

I go in to prepare my class doing my best to drop the stress that has been pushed on me. I glance at their homework and every bit of it is translation, every bit of it asks the students to know the Mandarin Chinese words and match them with English words and how much time do you think I spend on teaching the kids Chinese words?

If you guessed absolutely, fucking zero you guessed right.

The kids have illustrated books which show the vocabulary and in the case of our recent curriculum, prepositions of place, we’ve been playing games getting them to move about based on the preposition I tell them, drawing pictures based on the prepositions and describing pictures using the prepositions.

All of this is designed to associate the English words with the idea of the preposition that is communicated in the picture and by moving their bodies, all of this engages their brains in multiple ways because this is the way I’ve been taught to teach language, because I don’t have an assistant to translate for me and because I’m not a motherfucking Chinese teacher.

I mention this to politely to my boss and she listens but then says, “Well shouldn’t they know the Chinese word?”

And what I should say is, “No shit they should know the Chinese word, they have word lists to look that shit up on and a whole fucking nation to teach them the Chinese word, so I guess they should know it and you shouldn’t bug me the ENGLISH teacher about them not knowing the Chinese word.”

All I can say is, “Okay, I’ll teach them to translate.”

And people wonder why I say that teaching kids is the most thankless, pointless, annoying waste of time I’ve ever been engaged in.

Now as I write this I’ve got a headache, from teaching three classes of kids in a row and from feeling negative about all of it. The surface point is that I never want to teach kids, again, in any capacity, the deeper point is that we all need to learn how to let the stress other people try to hand us fall flat on their fucking feet. Because as soon as we take on other people’s stress we’re dragged down by it the same way they are. By taking on stress we multiply stress which doesn’t benefit anyone.

This has been one of the great lessons I’ve had from this year, refuse the stress of others make them grow up and deal with it. At the same time do not pass your stress on to others, grow up and deal with it yourself.

I have enjoyed many things about this past year but with three months left on my contract I’d like nothing better than to be able to wash my hands of it right now… I don’t have that luxury so I’ll do my best and then let it go.

Here’s my quick take on how the finals are likely to play out and the historical rammifications.

What I expect to happen.

Boston wins because:

-Derek Fisher can’t keep Rajon Rondo from penetrating and breaking down the Laker defense and the only Laker who might be able to is Kobe Bryant which will wear Kobe out. Also if they make this switch Ray Allen will murder the Lakers all by himself.

-Boston’s team defense is very good enough to weather Kobe’s attacks

-Boston has greater depth than Los Angeles and they’ve shown more will so far.

Historically this will mean that Kevin Garnett, Paul Pierce and Ray Allen cement their HOF resumes, all of these guys have had to carry teams in the past and richly deserve this win.

It will also be the end of the big three with Rajon Rondo emerging as the man for the Celtics, this after he was subject of trade rumors more than once since the 2008 title. Rondo has a chance to join the Walt Frazier and Gary Payton club of elite two way point guards.

Why I might be wrong.

Pau Gasol. If he can be the same Pau Gasol he’s been against everyone else against Boston’s great defense the Lakers have a shot.

Either way it should be a great series and one that the NBA won’t interfere in since both teams are from major media markets and make the league money. Enjoy.

Google Richard Wolff and “Capitalism Hits the Fan” watch the video very insightful stuff that we all need to take in.

It’s raining which is good, we need rain. It helps the farmers and gives people something to whine about.

Dr. Lin is slowly repositioning the bones in my foot/ankle and I’m learning how sweet it is to walk and move without pain. I’m not sure when that’ll happen for me again but I’m confident that it will happen.

Friends have left or are getting ready to leave and that’s never very fun. I like to fantasize about being able to visit them all and about having my own, completely self-sustaining, home in Alaska for them to visit.

The Celtics are 3-0 on the Magic now and we’re inching closer to a finals that will go along way towards defining the legacies of a generation of NBA greats. Depending how it goes Kobe Bryant could either pull alongside or pass Michael Jordan, Pau Gasol could cement his status as the greatest European of his generation and move into discussions about the greatest big men of all time, Kevin Garnett reignite the debate about whether he or Tim Duncan is the better player, Derek Fisher could cement his status as one of the games great contributors and clutch players. Either way Ray Allen has already buried the ridiculous Reggie Miller comparisons and cemented his legacy.

Interesting basketball equation for you all (Reggie Miller + Jason Kidd = one complete player and one complete asshole) think about it, then think about this. As much talent as that hypothetical player would have I’d still take Rajon Rondo over him.

All morning I’d been telling myself to concentrate on my driving but I had all kinds of thoughts bubbling up in my head as I rode towards Teacher Ho’s house. So it was that with ten minutes left on my drive I hit a patch of loose gravel and mud and overcompensated sending the scooter down on it’s left side with my left ankle between the scooter and the road.

I have still images in my head moments of the action which happened very fast. I’m sliding, I try to correct and go to far. I know I’m falling. I’m down the bike is on top of me and I bounce up and out from under the bike somehow. At some point in the process I say, “Fuck.”

I sat for a minute then righted and pulled it to the side of the road. I sat again, my lower leg and ankle were in obvious pain. I relaxed and breathed and got up and rode the rest of the way.

At Teacher Ho’s house I went inside and sat down. I started talking to An Jay and showed him my bloody knee (only minor) teacher Ho asked what happened and then started massaging my foot and ankle. After a bit he asked me if I wanted one his student’s to do acupuncture. I could only smile and say yes.

How many houses does one go to with Chinese medical doctors waiting to help?

A day later I can walk with minimal discomfort and am on the road to recovery. Of course I never needed to be on this road in the first place, if I’d kept my mind on the road.

It is 1991 or 1992 and I’m in high school. I DJ at KHNS and because of that I buy my first CD, Public Enemy: Apocalypse ’91. I don’t even have a CD player of my own at the time.

Nationally there is controversy over the song, “By the time I get to Arizona” because if portrays a team of armed black militants heading to Arizona in order to enforce the celebration of Dr. Martin Luther King’s birthday. Arizonans had recently voted not to celebrate the holiday.

Personally there is no controversy it’s a dope song and idea. I think, “Not only are they racist they’re dumb as shit too, who votes against a day off?”

It is 1994 and I’m in Durango, Mexico a guest in the home of the Piedra-Chavez familia. The matriarch of the family tells me the story of how her family moved from the US to Mexico. I begin to understand how long Latinos have been in territory now occupied by the United States.

Her son Jacobo mentions that he visited Phoenix once, that it was hot. “Like hell.”

It is 2002 or 3 and my colleague Larry is telling me about a game of pick up basketball, “So Big Daddy fouls this guy hard and his friend says, ‘Hey man where I’m from we don’t hit people like that.’ I tell him, “Where I’m from we deport people like you.”

I tell Larry that this is one of the most racist things I’ve ever heard. I imply that the guys he said it to could have kicked his ass and he wouldn’t have gotten any sympathy from me.

Larry is from Arizona.

It is 2010 and the state of Arizona passes a law that makes it a crime to be an illegal immigrant, requires police to actively profile Latinos, to stop them and search them and demand that they show proof of their legal status.

On May 5th the Phoenix Suns at the behest of their owner Robert Sarver wear their Los Suns jerseys in their playoff game against the San Antonio Spurs. They win the game largely because my childhood, and adulthood, hero Grant Hill holds Manu Ginoboli to 11 points. Steve Nash speaks out in against the law, all the players agree to wear the jerseys in protest, GM Steve Kerr says that the law is an echo of Nazi Germany.

Meanwhile on facebook my older brother, posts a message questioning why the United States doesn’t put illegal immigrants in labor camps like the North Koreans or shoot them on sight as they apparently do in Afghanistan. I cannot let this pass, I comment about the silliness of aspiring to be like a dictatorship which Americans died fighting or a country that has been a war zone for three decades and on the hypocrisy of Americans of European descent talking about “illegal aliens.”

I walk home having not made a blog post in over a month, knowing that I need to write this, knowing that I will post it and something else pops into the back of my head. It is this… a police state does not emerge fully formed overnight, it begins slowly, attacking those least able to defend themselves, defining them as illegal, less than human. This is accepted and even supported by the majority because they’re racist or fed up and want someone to suffer or don’t know what they’re voting for… for whatever reason the law passes, it is protested by those awake and compassionate enough to care and those it affects most immediately but it is not repealed and with time it becomes normal. With more time the idea that anyone can be checked and required to show proof of their legal status becomes accepted, the definition of illegal evolves and expands… and so it goes.

It is 2010 and I do not live in a police state nor do I ever intend to, I will not allow people’s humanity to be stripped away based on their skin color or place of birth, I will not allow our natural rights to be slowly eroded.

I know that some people will applaud what I say, some will think that I, “think too much,” others will be irritated by my comments thinking that I’m crazy or a leftist or a race traitor.

My only response is that my people come in all colors, from all places, with all manner of likes, dislikes, loves and prejudices, attributes and flaws and that I love all of my people as I love all of myself.

After a lot of thought I’m taking a hiatus. This blog hasn’t been going the way I want it to for a long time now. I’ll take the blame for it because I overestimated people’s levels of awareness and willingness to explore areas outside of their comfort zones. I should have seen this sooner and stopped sooner but I didn’t and in not stopping I put myself in the role of expert which I’m not. So the blind have been attempting to wake up the sleepwalking and, well frankly I’m tired of the game.

So I’m taking an indefinite rest. I hope to work on other writing projects and to spend more time changing my life along the lines that I have been discussing.

See you when I see you.