The Angry Jew

The rantings of an Angry Jew in The Pacific Northwest

OK folks, it is time for us to have a serious talk about this.  More hot teachers are making news.

First we have Tiffany Shepherd, a biology teacher at Port St. Lucie High School in Florida.  Now depending on who you want to believe, Tiffany was either fired for missing too much work or for taking a side job with Smokin’ Em Charters as a Bikini Mate, fetching beer and sandwiches for charter fishing clients.

Next there is Stephanie Ragusa, seen here is these grinning mug shots, who was arrested for having sex with a fifteen year old boy.  Well I should say arrested three times as it was discovered that not only did she continue to send explicit messages to her victims following her first arrest, but actually continued to have a sexual relationship with one of them resulting in her third arrest.

I guess my question with all this, is this really a bad thing?

I am not trying for a punch line here, I just have to wonder how much damage is being done to a hormonal teenage boy getting some from an older woman.  Yes, I realize these women are pursuing these boys to fill some kind of void or defect in their own psychological make up, but what real harm is there being done to the victims.

God knows there are enough case studies available.  All you have to do is go to Badbadteacher.com to see all of the predators and details of their arrests and prosecution.  Has anyone done any research into the long term effects of these May/December flings?  I have read plenty of theory’s of the long term damage that can be caused to the boys, but I am looking for facts.

I find it telling that the victims are rarely the ones going to police.  It is usually a parent or other authority figure.

Remember, I am looking for facts, not opinion, theory or rhetoric.  Has anyone followed up on these boys and documented any long term harm these trysts have done to them?

Any thoughts?

In an hour long news conference held this morning in the White House Rose Garden, President Bush stated  “If there was a magic wand to wave, I’d be waving it, of course.  But there is no magic wand to wave right now. It took us a while to get to this fix.”

Bush used the impromptu news conference to blame Americas financial woes on Congress for not passing legislation, that among other things, would allow oil drilling in the Alaskan wilderness, build oil refineries on old military bases, regardless of whether or not their was an oil pipeline nearby, not jumping on McCane’s “gas tax vacation” and for a general lack of…wait for it…Leadership.

“I believe that they’re letting the American people down, is what I believe,” he said. “It’s either a lack of leadership or a lack of understanding of the issue. And either way, it’s not good for the country.”

So that’s it.  Thanks George and I am sorry.  I thought, as President, leader of the free world, it was up to YOU to guide us through tough times.

It is all so clear to me now.

It wasn’t the ill fated incursion into Iraq, not the tax breaks for big business and your oil buddies.  All of our economic woes have had nothing to do with deregulation of the banking industry, bad lending practices, the waste in our military procurement, and an overall lack of concern for Joe Sixpack.

It has been Congress all along.

Those Rat Bastards.

Thanks for setting me straight George.

Well friends, once again the Rose City is making national news.

Is it our governor’s steadfast pledge to stick with biofuels no matter how much environmental and economic damage it causes?

Nope.

Our higher then the national average gas prices?

Not so much.

Is it the fact that our schools are making kids shave off their eyebrows before they can return to school after indulging in the latest teen fashion trend?

BINGO.

School administrators, after having solved all other educational problems in the state, have now turned to sending kids home for shaving lines in their eyebrows.

The schools call it gang related.  The teens call it fashion.  Me, I call it a complete waste of time.

School administrators say they are only following the advice of police, who were the first to notice the trend in gang members.  A member of a “13th street” gang would shave one line in one eyebrow and three in the other as a way of showing their affiliation.  Of course, as go the gangs, so to goes fashion.

Apparently covering the mutilated eyebrows is not enough to guarantee the safety of our children.  Those sent home after violating the schools policy are being told they must shave off their eyebrows or fill in the lines with eyebrow pencils.

You have to love this city.

With tax rebate checks hitting accounts today and oil hitting a new record price of $120 barrel, I did find a little glimmer of good news hidden away in the business news today.

It seems Conoco-Phillips is going to report a 17% jump in earnings for the first quarter of 08.  The rest of the oil companies should be reporting their first quarter profits by the end of the week.

We wish them well.

Drew Carey leads us through the seamy underbelly of the illegal Bacon Dog market in Los Angeles. This my friends is yet another reason why I left.

Lets face it, when you are an Angry Jew here in the Northwest, nothing is ever boring, as the following tale will attest to.

My Saturday started a little too early for my tastes. I had been invited by my new friend Harris to participate in a blood drive at the Ahmadiyya Mosque in Portland. I have never been to Mosque before and have never really had a chance to participate in a Muslim gathering either. I was excited to receive the invitation, so it was with only a small amount of reluctance that I dragged my tired butt out of bed at 8 AM after pulling a 3 to 11 shift the night before.

It was a rare sunny day in Portland when I arrived at the Mosque and I quickly found Harris in the community room and was greeted warmly in the traditional Muslim manner. I reviewed all the paperwork and in no time was told I could go down to the Red Cross Blood Mobile to make my donation.

The screening was much more intensive then I had remembered from past donations, with greater emphasis placed on visiting countries where mad cow disease was prevalent, mostly European countries. My screener was an American Muslim woman, and we talked a bit about politics before it was my turn on the table. In short order I was bleeding into a bag.

A little woozy, but no worse for wear, I headed back up to the community room. Harris proudly introduced me to his son and some of friends from the mosque, but oddly not to his wife, a very attractive Turkish woman in traditional Muslim garb. I was unclear as to whether this was an oversight on his part or merely cultural I don’t know, and I have to admit I was a little uneasy about asking. I helped myself to some food and took a few moments to observe the interactions of the people present.

The woman sat apart from the men, caring for the children present, everyone seemed to have infants with them, while the men talked, ate, and ran the blood drive. The men would dote on their children, but did not seem to publicly interact with their wives. By the same token, the women were not at all subservient to the men, each gender simply interacted within it’s own group. There was an odd warmth to the environment, a comfortable feeling that everything was, for this group,  in it’s place. It is not something I have felt before when visiting say a church function. Strangely, it felt more like I remembered visiting temple felt when I was young.

Harris offered me a tour of the Mosque. We removed our shoes and proceeded upstairs via the mens staircase. There is a separate staircase used by the women. The sanctuary was a stark, simple room under a stained green dome. It was here that the daily call to prayer is observed. The room was divided by fan fold doors, men would pray in front, the woman to the rear. Harris explained that this was not in any way to show women as subservient, and that in many mosques, prayers are said with the men and the women side by side, but again separated by some type of divider.

Large windows faced north, the direction of Mecca from Portland, with a small lectern in front of them. While Harris and I were catching up on news of the world, we were joined by two young non Muslim children, full of questions. It made me smile to watch Harris do his best to explain to them why shoes were not permitted and what it meant to prostrate ones self before God. This guy is going to be a great dad.

Before I left, I was given a gift by Harris. It was a book written by a former prophet of the Ahmadiyya called “The Gulf Crisis & The New World Order”. It is a look at the first Gulf War from a Muslim perspective. I read the first ten or so pages while I was there, and I am excited to read and then discuss it with Harris.

I took my leave feeling that I had learned much and done my good deed for the day, all in one stop. I decided to reward myself with a cup of coffee and stopped into World Cup. I spent a few minutes catching up with Marti and she asked me to look into a new law effecting Oregon booksellers. I have since and this one is worthy of it’s own posting. Watch for it soon, this one is a doozey.

She inquired about how things were going with C, the woman I had met in the shop the prior weekend, and I was sad to report that C had responded to an invitation to coffee this weekend with a message that she had read my blog, and that while she had found the posting about or meeting “sweet” it was not her “piece of pie” and apparently there was something offensive about it to her. I left her a message asking what had so offended her, but, alas, I have yet to receive a response. Oh well, different strokes for different folks.

I decided to wander the mall for a bit, I love to people watch, and had ducked outside for a smoke when I fell in love. This time, with a puppy. A young woman, I later found out her name was Jen, was walking the cutest puppy I have ever seen. As it turns out, she works at the mall pet shop and was taking the little guy out for a walk on her break. We chatted while I played with a cuddly, feisty ten week old scrap of fur. A spaniel mix, he was the greatest “Babe Magnet” I had ever seen. Not a single woman who walked by could resist loving on the little guy while I played with him. I was sorely tempted to buy him on the spot, but common sense prevailed and I took a pass. With summer coming up, my busy season at work, the little guy would be living in a crate while I work 10 hour days.  Besides Angel, my cat, would kill me in my sleep if I brought a puppy into her domain.

But honestly, ladies, could you resist a man with this little guy?

Well, from there it was off to the grocery store to pick up a few things for the weekend. It was in the parking lot that I met Her and Them. Her was a 57 cherry Buick and Them, well they were a group of ladies that had me cracking up so hard I could barely walk.

She wouldn’t start, and I offered to lend a hand. Her motor was a joy to behold. All stock and so simple, not a black box in sight. When they cranked her, I could hear she was starving, and I suggested that she might be out of gas. Well, the ladies decided to push her over to the gas station on the corner, about a 1/4 mile away. How could a gentleman refuse to help?

We got her rolling, and had to jog to keep up when she hit the small incline in the parking lot. When we got to the gas station, the gods flipped us the bird and we had to wait for a pump to open up. We laughed and joked and took pictures

until a pump opened up.

When one did, everyone around joined in to get her into position. It was quite the team effort. I asked about the dynamic of the group, and my “Gaydar” was right on track, the car was owned by a lesbian couple and their teenage daughter, the rest of the group were all friends visiting from Los Angeles, another small world moment.

She fired up on the first try, but sounded weak. I suggested she might be missing on a cylinder and she might need a new fuel filter. They told me she had just gotten her out of the shop and that they would be taking her right back. They had come to the grocery store to pick up beer and supplies for a girls night in. There were warm thanks from all for my help and I had an attack of the warm fuzzies watching them all pile in to her.

Ladies, if you are reading this, thanks for the smile that lasted me the rest of the day. I am sorry for the crappy picture and if you will email me one of the ones you took, I will gladly replace it so that She can be seen in all her glory.

Like I said, just another boring Saturday for The Angry Jew.

King George II is here for you America and he is going to make things all better.

“Starting Monday, the effects of the stimulus will begin to reach millions of households across our country,” Bush said Friday in remarks on the South Lawn of the White House.

Thats right, the administration’s much vaunted economic stimulus package is on the way.

“The money is going to help Americans offset the high prices we’re seeing at the gas pump, the grocery store, and also give our economy a boost to help us pull out of this economic slowdown,” Bush said.

Wait one, weren’t we supposed to spend this money on lavish consumer goods to boost the economy?

Just last month King George said “When the money reaches the American people, we expect they will use it to boost consumer spending…”.  Now I am supposed to use my one time pay out from the high and mighty government to pay for the necessities of every day life?  I’m confused here.

Since I am just an angry Jew with a high school education, can some one please explain, in simple English, how exactly  my spending less then a weeks pay is going to cut the price of rice, which has almost doubled in the last 6 months?  How, exactly, is it going to offset the triple digit price of a barrel of light, sweet crude oil?   By spending this money, will the bank’s stop foreclosure proceedings on thousands of American homes?  Are the drugs they need to live going to get cheaper?  Health insurance?  Corn?

Go ahead, speak up, I am listening.

Is this Government Pocket change going to have any real impact on Joe Six Pack, the hero of the not so middle class?  Maybe George should sneak out of his palace every once and a while and see what REAL Americans are dealing with every day.

At least according to the Government.

In a study to be released today, the Government is reporting that kids are doing better then ever in their first ten years of life.

6th graders feel safer at school, reading and math scores are up for 9 year olds, more preschoolers are being vaccinated and fewer are being poisoned by lead.  All in all, the study, funded Foundation for Child Development, reports a 10% increase in children’s well being from 1994 to 2006, despite increases in childhood obesity and low birth weight during the same period.

Really?  You don’t say?

I wonder how they factored in predatory child care workers.  Are female teachers banging their students considered a good thing?  How do you know if a sixth grader feels safer?  Did they talk to them when they were in the third grade and then again 3 years later.

“Yea, their are not as many stinky poo poo heads cutting in line during dodge ball.” 

What kind of feel good happy happy, joy joy, pap is the Government feeding us these  days?

Have parents finally given up their pursuit of the Big House and SUV in order to spend more time with their kids?   Has health care become more available to lower income families?  Has the economy improved to the point where one parent can stay home to be a full time care giver to the child?  Have classroom sizes decreased?  Are teachers being paid more?

I must have missed the memo.

Listen, I only want what is the best for Americans children, but feeding the drones this type of spun data isn’t going to make it so.

Everything may be coming up roses for kids in the first decade of their lives, but it appears to me that in the second tens years, we are dumping tons of fertilizer on their heads in the hope that something beautiful will grow.

I claim no credit for this and I thank Reader Howie for bringing it to my attention.

Dear Sir,

I’m in the process of renewing my passport, and still cannot believe this.

How is it that Radio Shack has my address and telephone number and knows that I bought a t.v. cable from them back in 1997, and yet, the Federal Government is still asking me where I was born and on what date.

For Christ sakes, do you guys do this by hand?

My birth date you have on my social security card, and it is on all the income tax forms I’ve filed for the past 30 years.

It is on my health insurance card, my driver’s license, on the last eight goddamn passports I’ve had, on all those stupid customs declaration forms I’ve had to fill out before being allowed off the planes over the last 30 years, and all those insufferable census forms that are done at election times.

Would somebody please take note, once and for all, that my mother’s name is Maryanne, my father’s name is Robert and I’d be absolutely astounded if that ever changed between now and when I die!!!!!!

SHIT! I apologize, I’m really pissed off this morning. Between you an’ me, I’ve had enough of this bullshit!

You send the application to my house, then you ask me for my fuckin’ address. What is going on? You have a gang of Neanderthal assholes workin’ there! Look at my damn picture. Do I look like Bin Laden? I don’t want to dig up Yasser Arafat, for shit sakes. I just want to go and park my ass on a sandy beach. And would someone please tell me, why would you give a shit whether I plan on visiting a farm in the next 15 days?

If I ever got the urge to do something weird to a chicken or a goat, believe you me, I’d sure as hell not want to tell anyone!

Well, I have to go now, ’cause I have to go to the other end of the city and get another fuckin’ copy of my birth certificate, to the tune of $60.

Would it be so complicated to have all the services in the same spot to assist in the issuance of a new passport the same day?? Nooooo, that’d be too damn easy and maybe makes sense. You’d rather have us running all over the fuckin’ place like chickens with our heads cut off, then find some asshole to confirm that it’s really me on the goddamn picture - you know, the one where we’re not allowed to smile?! (fuckin’ morons) Hey, you know why we can’t smile? We’re totally pissed off!

Signed - An Irate fucking Citizen.

P.S. Remember what I said above about the picture and getting someone to confirm that it’s me? Well, my family has been in this country since 1776. I have served in the military for something over 30 years and have had security clearances up the yingyang. However, I have to get someone ‘important’ to verify who I am - you know, someone like my doctor WHO WAS BORN AND RAISED IN COMMUNIST fucking CHINA!

Damn I hate days like today.  Some bad news at work last night set me off, had to get out of there.  Hung out with Contractor Dave, who harped on me about something I didn’t want to talk about, God bless him for it, I know he’s just looking out for my best interests, and its not fair to criticize him for it, but so it it goes.  And besides, I got to turn him on to one of my favorite movies, Swingers.

So anyway, I got up, made some coffee, sat down, and then, well, I made a huge mistake.

I read the paper.

Hillary takes Pennsylvania, OK, expected that one.

Gas consumption is falling.  Demand dropped this month for the first time since ‘91 and for only the 5th time since 1951.  Great, just what we need, another excuse for the Oil Companies to jack up prices.

Thomas Kemper Soda’s, makers of some of the best root beer on the planet, announced they are switching from high fructose corn syrup to natural cane sugar.  They said it was to improve the quality of their product, but you only have to look at commodity prices to see the real reason.  Not to alarm anyone, but we are in the middle of a global food crisis, and anything made of corn is going to be selling for a premium.  Things are so bad that according to the UN, food costs per capita are at their highest point since 1945 and 100 million people are being driven into poverty by food prices alone.

The war in Iraq is down to a third of a page in the paper, on page 7 no less, despite 4,044 American deaths.  The biggest story?  “Chemical Ali”, Saddam’s right hand man, has been moved back into US Custody to be treated for a heart attack he suffered WHILE AWAITING EXECUTION.  Sure, why not?

The situation in Darfur is getting worse, with full deployment of the UN Peace Keepers now delayed until 2009.  300,000 dead and counting.

And to top it all off, forces in Somalia rescued the crew of a pirated freighter carrying food to the embattled nation and then accused the US Navy of laying down on the job.  To quote the Security Affairs Minister, “It is sad that the American Forces off the coast of Somalia are here for fun and are not combating the Pirates.”

Whatever.

Sorry for being such a downer today friends, I am sure I will be back in fighting shape by tomorrow.