The Angry Jew

The rantings of an Angry Jew in The Pacific Northwest

The world lost another iconic figure today when Lois Maxwell, who played Miss Moneypenny in the first 14 James Bond Films passed away  in a Freemantle hospital in Western  Australia .  She was 80 years old.

The Canadian born actress had the distinction of playing the part in a way never envisioned by writer Ian Flemming, adding a  sexual edge that was missing from the novels.  She is said to have become close friends with both Sean Connery and Rodger Moore during her time playing the role that made her famous.

She joins Bernard Lee, the original M and  Desmond Llewelyn who played Q in From Russia With Love to The World is Not Enough as actors who have passed away from the original films.

Rest in Peace Moneypenny

I got to tell you friends, “J”, my beloved manager at the local Qwicke-Mart is becoming one of my very best sources of material.  I limped over yesterday to pick up my coffin nails, and ended up staying for over an hour as she related her latest adventures.

Seems she rolled her car down a 300 foot cliff on Monday and not only walked away with a few bruises, but called her graveyard guy to tell him she wouldn’t be in while hanging upside down in the seat.  She then told the paramedics to hold on while she talked to her district manager on the phone.  They finally had to whack her up with Demerol just to get her to shut up and put away the phone.  Having gotten to know her over the past few months, I actually had no trouble believing that.

She then told me about her latest fan…Creepy Stalker Guy Scott.  It seems she met Creepy Stalker Guy Scott when she went out with a group of friends.  He came along as a friend of a friend.  Well, they had a few drinks, got to talking, then went to a movie, then the group went back out for a few more drinks.  Well, she thought that Creepy Stalker Guy Scott was a pretty nice guy, so she gave him her number.  He called her later, just to make sure she got home alright.  Awwww…ain’t that just cute.

Well, the next day he called her again….and again…and again.  Somewhere in the neighborhood 25 times starting at 6 AM and ending at 2AM.  Well, even psychos need their beauty rest.  It got worse over the next few days, he even started calling the Qwicke-Mart.  It finally stopped after she notified the police, and had a cop answer the phone.

I told her she should only give her number to people she knows are of fine upstanding character….like me for instance, but she just laughed.  Well, she has my number and a standing invitation to dinner out, and I promise, that if we do hit it off, I won’t call her for a month.

Damn my feet.  I was getting out the shower Tuesday before work and slipped.  I thought I just twisted my ankle a bit, so I laced up my boots a little tighter and off too work I went.

Well by the time my shift ended, I was limping pretty bad so the next morning I saw the Doc and he advised me that I had strained my Achilles tendon.  So for the last three days I have had my foot up on pillows, swallowing anti-inflamitory’s, and playing heat it up/ice it down.  This Sucks.

I was hoping to be back at work today, but it just aint going to happen.  I’m going a little stir crazy and am going to try to do some writing between ice packs.

Meanwhile, if anyone has any good jokes or something to cheer me up, any donations are gratefully accepted.

I am one pissed off Jew, the government has stolen one of my best ideas ever and claimed it as their own.  They are not giving me, The Angry Jew, the credit I deserve.

About five months ago, I wrote about my proposal for allowing illegal immigrants to gain citizenship through a combined military/jobs program.  I sent it to Senator David Wu of Oregon and received back a congressional “piss off” letter that I posted back in June.

Well, in the news lately has been talk of the DREAM act.  It is an idea that has been floated around Washington since 2001, when it was first introduced as a way for illegal immigrants to obtain Resident Alien Status by meeting certain educational requirements.

Well, in it’s latest incarnation, The DREAM act allows immigrants, who meet certain specific criteria, will be allowed to gain their Green Card by serving a two year tour in the military.  The Armed forces are all in favor of this new law, as it would open an entire new pool of potential recruits to help fill the ranks depleted by our little party in the desert. 

Now Im all for this plan.  I like the idea of immigrants expressing their desire to become citizens of this great nation by serving it.  What pisses me off, is that it was my idea to start with and I’m not getting credit for it. 

Oh well, at least the problem is getting fixed, I guess I should be happy with that but I’m telling you, I’m not sending those bastards any more of my ideas.  From now on, if the folks in Washington want access to my genius, they are going to have to come to the site, just like everybody else.

It seems that Senators accidentialy soliciting undercover police officers in public restrooms is not the only nasty thing going on in there.

In a study sponsored by The American Society for Microbiology and the Soap and Detergent Asscoiation, only 77% of adults wash their hands after using the facilities, a 6% drop from a similar study conducted in 2005.

88% of the woman and 66% of the men in the study cleaned up after touching their dirty parts. 

Shame on you America.  I may just have to give up shaking hands.

Oy Vey, people are getting stupider by the day.  Both of these examples come from right here in the Rose City.  Maybe it is something in the water, or the beer.

First up, and this was front page news yesterday, a young man thought it would be fun to put a live rattlesnake in his mouth.  It seems this self professed “snake collector” was handling a baby rattler at a party and he creeped out his girlfriend.  To show the snake was not dangerous, he put it in his mouth.  Well, the snake bit him on the tongue, which caused it to swell enough to block his airway and give him enough venom to kill six adults.  Alas, his girlfriend was able to get him to the hospital in time to save his life, thereby guaranteeing that he will live to reproduce.  In an interview, he said that his heavy drinking was a contributing factor.  NO.  Really?

Next, the tale of the gunshot that wasn’t.  A young man arrived in Portland after taking a bus from California with what he claimed was a gunshot wound in his shoulder.  His friends got him to the hospital after the wound started to bleed heavily.  Doctors treating him were stumped as they could not find an exit wound and there was no bullet, so they called in the police.  While being interviewed by the police, the man admitted that he had not been shot, but had stabbed himself in the shoulder with a pen.  Then, thinking he had left part of the pen in his shoulder, he went digging in the wound with a hunting knife trying to retrieve it.  While doing this, he nicked an artery, hence the heavy bleeding.  Police said no charges would be filed because it is still legal to be an idiot.  Oh, one other thing.  He said he did it because he just really likes pain.  Damn, don’t people have to be on Meth do do things like this?

There you go folks.  More proof that humanity is clinging to the edge of the bowl waiting for the big flush.

     

One of my core beliefs is that the universe always finds a balance.  Good things happen in life to balance out the bad. 

So when OJ Simpson was arrested this weekend on ten felony charges stemming from a Las Vegas hotel room confrontation where “Juice” and some of his golf buddies tried to retrieve some of his stolen (?) memorabilia at gunpoint, I just had to laugh.

I will bet Ron Goldman is laughing too, and so is Denise Brown, sister of Nicole Simpson.

OJ got away with murder and now the universe is finding its balance.

I lived in LA during the OJ trial fiasco.  Coming right on the heels of the LA Riots, it served to further polarize a community that had suffered enough.  It also proved that America has the finest criminal justice system that money can buy.

It gave us Judge Ito, Johnny Cochrain, The Dream Team, Mark Fuhrman (find me a cop in LA who hasn’t used the “N” word), and of course, “if it does not fit you must acquit”.  OJ’s defense team was able to raise that reasonable doubt that let him walk, while everyone with half a brain who bothered to look at the facts, knew the truth of his guilt.  I am just happy to see the OJ used his freedom to follow through on the promise he made to spend the rest of his life searching for the real killers and to bring them to justice.

True to his word, OJ has scoured almost every golf course in America in his never ending quest to clear his name and bring his poor dead wife and her friend some peace.

OJ has managed to become just another in long list of “Celebretards” ( this word is copyrighted by Angry Jew World Domination Inc., Hell, if Paris Hilton can copyright “That’s Hot”, I can do it too)  that have found their way into the legal system, but unlike Paris and Lindsey, I don’t think OJ is going to get any special treatment. 

The American people have a long memory when they want to, and I don’t think OJ is going to be able to slime his way out of this one.  He made bail today and is headed back to Miami, but if my theory holds true, OJ is going to be back in Vegas soon, and it is not going to be on a golf course.

I received a most interesting comment to my Teachers Packing Heat post a few days ago.  It appears I have earned the ire of The Oregon Firearms Federation.  Kevin Starrett wrote and said:

You are wrong about many things.

Oregon law does not require an”eight hour” class to get a CHL. It only requires that you take a class from an NRA certified instructor.

You are also wrong in your elitist “I have been trained and therefore I am better than you” attitude. Thousands of people without your training use firearms every year to defend themselves successfully. Your solution is to leave this woman defenseless because she has not taken the same classes you have. You have no idea what training she has. You have just jumped on the bandwagon that says only people who went to the schools I did have a right to stay alive.

You are really no different from the Brady crowd.

What?  Me, a member of The Brady Crowd?  OK, those of you who know me need to stop laughing right now, this is serious stuff.  I replied to Mr Starrett by email with what I thought was a very nice note despite the insult.

I thought I would take a moment to respond to your comments 1 to 1.  I thank you for taking the time to write and express your views. 

I do take umbrage at your comparing me to the “Brady Crowd”.  I have actively opposed any measure that restrict the rights to keep and bear arms.  Talk about making asumptions.

You did make some excellent points, some I can simply not refute, others that perhaps you might want to consider.

First, you are right, I do not know what training this woman has received, and I do not feel a lack of training should amount to a death sentence.  If, she has only received the training required in the state of Oregon however, she could be a danger to those around her in a deadly force confrontation.  Since those around her could conceivable be children, yes, I am very concerned.

My solution is not to leave any person defenseless, we are guaranteed the right of self protection under the 2nd amendment. My solution would be to increase the training requirements and force those seeking a permit to carry to demonstrate proficiency with their weapons in real world tactical environments.

Lastly, I am not going to apologize to you or to anyone for the training I have received.  In more then one case, it has enabled me to stay alive and to protect the lives of those around me, both victims and suspects alike.  As a concerned gun owner, I feel it is both my own and my fellow gun owners responsibility to seek out the very best training available to allow us to use our weapons in a safe and effective manner.

Gun ownership may be a right, but with that right comes grave responsibility.

I thank you again for your time, please feel free to join in on the site at any time.

With Warmest Regards

The Angry Jew

Call me an elitist, gun control type.  Take that.

Kevin responds:

 I do not seek to have you or anyone else apologize for the training you
have received. I encourage people to get all they can. I take advantage
of every chance I get to learn from whoever I can, whenever I can.

As a firearms instructor I offer free safety classes to anyone who
requests them. Our Foundation has funded safety classes for hundreds of
women who were the victim of domestic violence across the state. We
have also paid to have people attend firearms schools  like Oregon
Firearms Academy.

The point I was trying to make is this.  As a full time activist for
gun rights, I often find myself having to battle other gun owners who
think more restrictions should be imposed on people seeking to have
concealed handgun licenses.  Invariably they are people who took some 
class or attended some school and come to feel that no one is competent
unless they’ve been to the same class. It’s elitist and not accurate.

It is my position(and we have worked to make it law, with no success)
that there is no legitimate reason to require a CHL. If you license a
right, it ceases to be a right. Do some people have more skill than
others in a particular area? Of course. Can some people respond better
to a crisis than others? Obviously. But to demand that a person meet
some arbitrary benchmark before they are allowed to protect themselves
opens the door to a never ending expansion of those demands, placing
the natural, God given right of  self-defense out of the reach of all
who do not have the time and resources to get expensive, time consuming
professional gun fighter training.

Everyone can benefit from high end training. I have. But where does it
stop? Exactly what level of professionalism would you demand before you
would allow this (very intelligent) woman the right to stay alive?  As
I am sure you are aware, the police have no duty to protect her. Her
school has no intention of protecting her. She is on her own. (Well, we
are paying the legal bills, but we’re 300 miles away.)

Training is great. That’s why we do it for free. (Others charge 50 to
100 bucks for what I do gratis) But to make it mandatory requires that
someone, somewhere create the standards. When that happens the goal
posts move forever.

Having watched cops at my range, I have no reason to believe that there
is a natural correlation between firearms training and ability. We are
not asking people to clear a house full of armed druggies. We are not
asking people to make a felony car stop. We are offering people the
ability to point and shoot a handgun at an attacker who is 7 feet to 7
yards away.  You know as well as I do that plenty of trained cops can’t
get that done. Look at the Firearms Assault Discharge Reports from New
York. (well you can’t, they keep them secret.) But I have seen them.

Rush into a school with active shooters? Yep, trained coordinated swat
teams will do that better. (Well maybe not. They didn’t at Columbine.)
But shoot a single attacker? That’s a different story.

I was asked by an interviewer on MSNBC why she just didn’t stop going
to work. I am not prepared to ask any woman with this kind of problem
in her life to give up her livelihood too. And I don’t think I can
demand that she spend a month at Thunder Ranch before she can go on
with her life.

Anything can go wrong. Happens to cops all the time. I just want her to
have a fighting chance.

Kevin

Well at least he isn’t calling me names anymore.  It seems to me that he feels that anyone who does not agree with him is attacking the 2nd Amendment and gun ownership and carry rights, but I respect his right to his opinion, just as I hope he would respect mine.

I respond:

 Dear Kevin,
I am afraid we are going to have to agree to disagree on this point.

I can not, with a clear conscience, advocate a teacher carrying a gun into a
school full of kids without a mandatory minimum level of training, it is
just too great a risk.

I do know that several states do permit this, but I have not looked into the
requirements to do so.  I would hope that the level of training required is
higher then that which is required to obtain a concealed weapons permit in
Oregon.  It would only take one child wounded or killed to set the stage for
a roll back of shooters rights to carry
.
In fairness to your views, I intend to publish our correspondence and I will
include a link to your website in the article.

I thank you for your time and encourage you to post any comments you might
have on any of the topics I cover.

With Warmest Regards
The Angry Jew

There you have it friends.  Yet another debate on the social issues of our times brought to you by your benevolent leader.  Now I just hope I can find some time to write that piece on OJ I had planned for today.  So many stories, so little time.
 

After a firefight in Baghdad Sunday that left 8 civilians dead and another 14 wounded, The Iraq Interior Ministry announced today that they are revoking the license of Blackwater Security to operate in Iraq.

Who is Blackwater?  They are one of the largest of the new breed armies for hire.  Headed by a former Navy SEAL and King George Cronie, Blackwater has received hundreds of millions of dollars worth of no-bid contracts for duty in Post Katrina New Orleans and Iraq.  In 1997, they were hired by the nation of Azerbaijan to train their Naval Sea Commandos.

So, are private armies like Blackwater a bad idea?  They certainly pay better.  A “Security” professional can earn up to $100,000 a year for a tour in Iraq.  The bulk of their forces are made up of former Special Operations types from around the globe.  At one point, Congress expressed concern over Blackwater depleting the ranks of US Special Forces.

Another advantage is they are not bound by all those nasty regulations like The Rules Of Land Warfare and The Geneva Convention.  After all, they are just a security company.  A security company that has its own fleet of helicopters, armored personnel carriers, and a Tactical Transportation Division, Presidential Airways, that holds a Secret Facilities Clearance from the United States Department of Defense. 

And besides, they help us look good.  No one knows for sure how many contractors have dies in Iraq, because they are not included in official casualty counts, even if they are engaging in combat operations with insurgents and providing security for key Iraqi and American personnel, as well as US and foreign installations around the country.

So do we really need companies like Blackwater.  Well it does seem odd that over 90% of the companies contracts come from the US Government.  Why are we paying them hundred of millions of dollars for services that our own military should be providing?  

I have no problems with them providing specialized training for military and law enforcement, working to tighten up foreign troops, and providing logistical support services, but I got to tell you, the thought of them patrolling the streets of Portland after a major earthquake or other disaster does send a shudder up this Angry Jews spine.    

“J”, my friendly neighborhood Qwicke-Mart manager, related this story to me when I stopped in for my weekly ration of coffin nails.  It not only points out her big heart, but one of the things that is, more and more, convincing me that I am getting just plain old.

It seems she had an 18 something young man working for her who she took a liking to.  A bright kid, hard worker, a rarity these days.  The kid had a wife and baby and was doing his best to take care of them.  Well, he ended up doing something stupid, she never said what, and got himself arrested.  He called “J” and asked for help.  She stepped up and paid his bond out of her own pocket. 

He made all his court appearances, got some charges thrown out, others reduced, and has been working to make restitution, and pay back “J”.  A happy ending, right?

Nope.

It turns out the kid has been helping himself to beer, energy drinks, and other goodies while working.  She found the evidence the other day in one of the ceiling panels.  She knows it was him based on the stuff that she found, it was all his brand.  So what is she to do?  If she fires him, she is probably out the money she put up to help him out, if she does nothing, she places her own job in jeopardy.

I don’t envy her the choice she has to make, she took a chance and helped him out, and he smacks her in the face.

I applaud her for stepping up and helping out.  Too many of us would have turned our backs on this kid.  Why shouldn’t we?  Kids today, and by kids I mean those in the 18-21 range, seem to feel some sort of sense of entitlement.  As a young man, I learned the hard way that you had to work for what you wanted.  I was a lazy irresponsible young adult.  I was given the choice of going to college, getting a full time job, or getting the hell out of my parents house.  I was not going to get a free ride.  I choose to join the Navy and it turned out to be the best choice I ever made.  I came out 4 years later with a fairly strong work ethic, a sense of duty and honor, and an education into how the real world works.

I know that each generation thinks that the ones that follow have it too easy.  An I right or just falling into the same trap as my father, my grandfather, and his father before him.  I don’t know.

All I know is that a woman who tried to make a difference got screwed, and that just isn’t right.